life goes on.... and on... and on.....

i work in an office, of an OBGYN. ok 3 of them. today before lunch a young woman came to her weekly appt. she was due yesterday with her first child. today, there was no heartbeat.

we had to send her to maternity to deliver her baby, that died before it even got to breath air. i knew this happens....  i have never been so close. i cried and cried. i didn't even know her. i didn't even see her. (i answer phones... the only contact i actually have with patients) the women in the office -are the most wonderful women i have ever met. how they do this is beyond me. i could have walked away from the office today, and not gone back.

i was told everything happens for a reason. i was told the little soul is now with him....  i was told to look for the positive things, and try not to dwell on the bad. in our line of work, the good out weighs the bad by alot.

i kept thinking of  me at 20... pregnant with my oldest. i could not have endured what that young woman has to do. i can barely do it now, and it wasn't even me.......

life-death-babies

oh so much has happened in the past year of "forgetting to blog" . we had the vacation from hell. starting with my son having a seizure before we ever made it to the beach house. spent the first day @ the ER. spent the rest of vacation checking blood sugars and worrying. life goes on. home, and school starting. fall began, holidays rolling around... grandpa getting sick. spent thanksgiving @ the hospital in a near by city. he survived and came home. made it thru christmas.  :)    life goes on.
new year... new beginings... made it thru 6 weeks of a new job. one i like and hate at the same time. again- life goes on.  really wanted to shot the groundhog this feb 2....  (at least we weren't in the hospital with a extremely ill son, like last year) but it looks like the groundhog was wrong. spring really is springing in PA.
grandpa got ill again. this time, he went to heaven. he died on a friday, uncle bill died on saturday, my (soon to be) daughter in law's grandmother died monday... and my husband's second cousin died that same monday also. they say people die in 3's... well we have 4 so there is 2 to go....   meanwhile, life goes on. my oldest is getting married next month... to a wonderful girl (I introduced them... they will never live it down) and they are having a baby this fall... i am going to be a nana... wow... my dear husband, a grandpa....   life goes on...  just found out the sister that quit talking to the "rest of us" is @ home with hospice. cancer. i went to see her, she didn't want to see me. i did get to see my nephews and neices....   i did what i could.  and. life goes on....